You know, ex-boyfriends are
like boomerangs... you let them go, they vanish into the distance, you think
they are gone, but right when you turn the other way and when you least expect
them- that's when they come back to try and hit you in the back of the head.
...
Ex Message nº 1:
You
did not tell me you were fucking other guys while we were together.
Charming... also I
would say I wasn't, but I've long learned that you can’t prove a negative,
meaning no one is ever able to prove they "didn't" do something... so
yeah... oh, and I don't really care, but that's kind of a really abrupt (not to
mention stupid) accusation to make, so you mind telling me why you think that?
Just you know, for the hell of it.
...
This is where he sent me the typical message explaining and not very clearly,
the all “heard from a friend, who told a friend of another friend that guy X
said so.”
Followed by this:
Anyway...
Clean your house. Whether he is lying or not does not matter. I came here to
warn you, not give you shit. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I hope you are
well and I miss you. Please take care.
And again:
"I don't give a shit about
him. I was warning you.
If it's not true I have no reason
to doubt you now that I have spoken to you.
I know I did not do things very
well. I'm sorry. I just could not be there even though I really wanted to. It
was just not the right moment in my life."
As for cleaning my house... I already did.
That is why you aren’t there anymore.
That is why you aren’t there anymore.
About the rest... Did I at any point in the past
message made any mention whatsoever of you not having time to spend with me?
No. I did not. And while we were dating I didn’t either. What I did do, was in
the night you broke up with me say that I would prefer if when you actually
were with me you would refrain from being so constantly on your mobile that you
weren’t even listening to what I was saying.
Btw did it ever occur to you that I too might have
problems going on? That I wanted to tell you about? Because you know you were
my bf and all? No it did not, did it? Because your problems and your life are
way more important.
Free info: Everyone has problems, doubts, stuff that
isn’t what they want it to be in their lives. We deal with it. I don’t burden
you with my problems, but I honestly didn’t even mind you telling me yours,
what I DO mind is you using them as excuses.
The world doesn’t owe you shit. I owe you even less.
And as always hearsay proves to be a really reliable source but this is what
really cracks me up: “If it's not true I have no reason to doubt you now
that I have spoken to you.
Newsflash: You had no reason to doubt me even before
you spoke with me.
...Did I ever give you reason? Was I not there for
you every single time you needed or wanted me? Even on those times in which it
was really inconvenient or bad for me?
You know the answer to those questions better than I
do, and you also know something else, which is that people, who are fast to
think they were cheated on, normally have glass roofs. Meaning they would
cheat, so should I ask if there is something you want to tell me?
The sage continues:
I
never said you owed me anything. If you pay attention to my words you would
notice that I am the one who owes you something. I wasn't there. I know you had shit going on
with your job and other stuff and I just wasn't there. I'm sorry. And no, no
glass roof. I just have a long history of being cheated on. I did not come here to argue.
You
win, if that is what matters to you. I know I fucked up, I know I wasn't there.
I’m sorry. Have a goodnight. Be good.
Ahahahaha! Oh no,
darling.
Believe me, you owe me
nothing.
In fact I wish you the
very best. Because that is what I have now.
Someone who has yet to
tell me they love me, but at least I know that when he says it he will mean it.
Someone who may not
have much time and attention to give to me, but who tries. Who really tries,
who never makes excuses, because even when he can’t be there for me, he knows
he has nothing to apologize for, because he gave it his all.
Someone who just went
to a foreign country for more than a week for work, but when I told him I was
going out with a male friend to see a flower show, he said have fun and get me
something nice. And who laughed and told me I knew just what he liked, when I
told him I got him a carnivorous plant.
Someone who I am sure
doubts me in the privacy of his own dark thoughts but would never throw those
thoughts at me, because he knows not only that I don’t deserve them, but that
they are his doubts born from his fears and not from anything I’ve ever done.
Someone who talks to me
and argues with when he wants to know something, or when I do or say anything
that confuses him.
Someone who makes me
wish I had more of myself to give, and never makes me doubt or regret that
which I have already given.
Win? No it doesn’t
matter at least not in the way you think.
Because I don’t really
care about what you did or didn’t do. Or for that matter I don’t even care what
you do or don’t, who you slept with or are sleeping with.
Because I don’t care
about you. I did, a lot, but I only ever let people prove me wrong once. And
you proved me very wrong indeed.
I win, not because I
win, but because you lose.
And yes, have a good
night, have lots of good nights, I do hope you have all the good nights that
you may not deserve but that I wish for you nevertheless.
Goodbye
Closure,
also like a boomerang, comes when you least expect it.